Somewhere around Final Fantasy IX, you lose your job — only a day or so after you finally realized you've stopped going into the office. Well, whatever. Your parents can keep you in Mountain Dew and Doritos and pay the electric bill, and do you really need anything else to play? When your house is seized by the bank, you devolve into a series of couch-surfing situations; you are thrown out every time for hogging the TV with your console.
Under a downtown bridge, examining a knife you won in a recent fight, wondering why you can't have a simple conversation without seeing dialogue boxes in the air, you think about taking revenge against the writer of the article that took you down this dark path. Interactive fiction this, buddy.